this is work in progress or homilies or miscellaneous items
that donʼt warrant a page by themselves
or seem to fit better here
pending poems index
chronological order is from the bottom to the top of the page
audio files can be complemented by listening to them with the eyes closed !
jon w r i t e s
well actually i guess i am pretty addicted to browsing bullshit and not really doing much research
my
r e p l y
to research something is to see below the surface !
lol, i had just written the theist/atheist poem further below when this turns up in the inbox !
Hello dear,
My name is Rose Williams I have decided to donate what I have at the service of God through you, the sum of
$6.320 million
You may be wondering why I choose you in this humanitarian work
Since contacting you is a divine direction from God, I have no option. Presently, I am under limited living according to my physician
This money is an inheritance from my husband who deposited this money with a financial institution before his death
Let me know urgently your acceptance, handling this humanitarian work on my behalf for the benefit of street children, open orphanage homes, schools, hospitals and helping widows. God is my strength and in Him, I put all my trust and faith because with him, all things are possible. Get back to me urgently for more details as you agree with your heart to give this transaction effective handling. May you remain blessed
Mrs. Rose Williams
should i become a theist and collect my share of the
$6.32 million ?
Writers Are Always A Charity !
: o)
iʼm not a theist
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm
N O T
“ I
”
iʼm not a theist
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm
NOT
I
iʼm not a theist
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm
not
i
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm not a theist
iʼm
N O T
“ I
”
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm not a theist
iʼm
NOT
I
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm not a theist
iʼm
not
i
iʼm not a theist
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm
NOT
i
iʼm not a theist
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm
not
i
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm not a theist
iʼm
N O T
I
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm not a theist
iʼm
i
iʼm an atheist
iʼm a theist
iʼm
i
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm not a theist
iʼm
NOT
i
iʼm not an atheist
iʼm not a theist
iʼm
not
i
its easier to be unfair to a person after they are dead
!
. .
o
(
)
its easier to be unfair to a person after they are dead
!
. .
o
(
its easier to be unfair to a person after they are dead
!
: o (
its easier to be unfair to a person after they are dead
!
its easier to be unfair to a person after they are dead
jon writes on internet addiction
. . but there is never such a feeling of being satiated with browsing
my reply
you have to sorta “ research ” when you browse, lots of sideways searching to explore in depth . .
that's also how you end up with top quality material !
a good michael palin
video on andrew wyeth
i try to say something about life but i can't . . .
theoredics always seem to collapse into absurdity at some point
illumination is by example only ! . . : o )
i try to say something about life but i can't . . .
theoredics always seem to collapse into absurdity at some point
illumination is by example only ! . . : o )
i try to say something about life but i can't . . .
theoredics always seem to collapse into absurdity at some point
illumination is by example only ! . .
i try to say something about life but i can't . . .
theoredics always seem to collapse into absurdity at some point
illumination is by example only !
i try to say something about life but i can't . . .
theoredics always seem to collapse into absurdity at some point
illumination is by example only
lorianne disabato
w r i t es
every sunday, i spend a good part of the day preparing for the coming week, packing lunches and setting out not just one but five outfits, each coordinated down to the jewellery
on any given morning, i don’t have time to stand in front of my closet wondering what to wear, so it makes the day go more smoothly if I can simply jump in the shower, knowing that day’s outfit is at the top of the pile
my
r e p l y
i guess the male mind balks at that
, especially the word
“ co-ordination ” !
actually you can tell a lot about a woman by the jewellery she wears, maybe its some sort of evolutionary signalling system !
men take heed !
but i wouldn't be surprised if women also used it to assess others of their gender !
i know
some-one who donated his kidney to his brother, imo it affected him adversely !
actually there is a writer karl ove knausgaard is
indebted to
, another
norwegian !
a
folly , a lot of ability and work going in the wrong direction
!
the endless female fascination with
display !
sepehr a s k s
is it better to do shikantaza outside or to do it in one's room with the red light ?
does being in natural scenery facilitate the deconstructive effects ?
i do speak from experience
my
r e p l y
“ I do speak from experience ”
why are you asking me then ?
this sort of thing is too involving for me and you need to be much more self reliant !
what would interest me is when you have spent a month or two working things out and are able to share your observations so there is some benefit and interest to myself as well as you !
----------------------
this work is not a prescription, its a process of discovery
!
the problem with the comments section of blogs is the owners are obliged to address wrong minded or erronous comments to “ keep their end up ” so to speak, otherwise the poster is getting a “ free ride ” selling their bullshit . .
this is actually a huge burden in energy and time
i don't know why this has taken me so long to figure out . .
with private messages or email you are free to simply ignore without public consequence . .
the other advantage is that with a private approach, people have to take on board the fact its they that want contact with you and not you with them which should be somewhat chastening . .
with public domain posting they can fool themselves their posting is just part of a public discourse and they don't have to take you, the blog owner seriously and so these inconsiderate arseholes just piss all over the place as is their habitual want . .
reddit zen, hinduism and meditation and the hardcore zen blog are suitable public urinals for these stupids !
: o ) (
hinduism is a montage of idiocy
!
hinduism is a montage of idiocy
!
hinduism is a montage of idiocy !
hinduism is a montage of idiocy
david foster wallace was in his sister's words “an incredible pot head” at high school, that makes a lot of sense, he damaged his brain, he's sorta not quite there in terms of being a
quality thinker !
his sister's
reference
there's research out about how damaging pot is during the fragile developmental stage of adolesence and also young adulthood !
maybe he smoked pot all his adult life and charles bukowski (who was a first rate thinker) was right, pot damages the cognitive capabilities way more than alcohol !
anti-disciple : you are wrong
me : why are you talking to me ?
anti-disciple for the next three years proceeds to tell me how right they are . .
anti-disciple : you are wrong
me : why are you talking to me ?
anti-disciple for the next three years proceeds to tell me how right they are . .
my
c o m m e n t
some repeating patterns are very penal !
i wish i was joking !
:
o
(
you seek what you understand, you cannot entertain what you do not understand !
you seek what you understand, you cannot entertain what you do not understand
zakaj
, you seek what you understand, you cannot entertain what you do not understand !
zakaj
, you seek what you understand, you cannot entertain what you do not understand
i was looking at brad warner's
problems critically, it's obvious to me and i guess will slowly become obvious to him that book tours are not viable financially and how could they be with ebooks and the web with its near perfect low cost distribution system and also how his book was crap anyway . .
bad brad . .
well i was sort of still running this in my mind when i decide to try to take a plastic fitting off the wet half of a submersible bore pump, heat up the rim with a gas flame and see if it will unscrew . .
so trying to unscrew it (it didn't) i grabbed too close to the hot stainless steel and now have a
2nd degree burn on my left first finger and thumb ( trying some
vitamin k on it ! )
this sort of thing can be a nuisance for two weeks to a month !
bad andrew . .
we are incompetent in our different ways
this is one lesson life has taught me as i grow older . .
if there's a fray, hang back !
. .
o
(
)
if there's a fray, hang back !
: o ) (
if there's a fray, hang back !
if there's a fray, hang back
linking opens up the interest for the reader
too much is distracting from the original post is the negative side
but well judged linking makes for a richer reading experience !
well, i learnt something interesting today, yeast only makes alcohol when its starved of oxygen, that's why alcoholic beverages are made in sealed containers !
when no oxygen is available alcohol fermentation occurs in the cytosol of yeast cells !
ethanol and carbon dioxide are waste products from producing ATP from glucose under anaerobic conditions !
zakaj, you are just passing the time pissing nonsense
you are just passing the time pissing nonsense
fuck chernobyl, they still have radioactive reindeer in finland !
the tattoo ink industry is entirely unregulated, they could put in cyanide legally !
basically the inks look like an infection to the body and are walled off which is why they remain there, but what's in the inks slowly leaks out plus there's a heft to the body from the initial placement !
also an allergy problem as that is the mechanism by which they are retained
sepehr psuedo-asks
what orchestra gives the best renditions of bach's music ?
my re p l y
sepehr, please do not post comments as asked in the
7th patriarch blog description !
you don't put the contemplative time in, you will always be stuck at a level below what i am interested in
i don't say you should do it but i need to watch out for myself !
sepehr replies
the best way to read cioran's tears and saints is by listening to bach and meditating to it ( ie shikantaza, watching one's own thoughts and letting them dissolve without reference point)
I think that constitutes contemplative time
my
r e p l y
my god, we are finally getting down to it !
i'm glad you wrote that, its the essence of the difference !
that is just writing some-one else's thoughts over your own, real contemplation is endless years of the mind turning over itself and on itself in a sort blankness for the most part . .
see we really disagree at a fundamental level and our contact while not quite hostile is contrary, we both vote with our different approaches so at this point i am withdrawing
please go your own way . .
we are all damaged robots here, but your way is the way of the vast majority, entertaining themselves until they die, my way is only taken by one in a million . .
what robert blake should have asked himself before he arranged for (or did himself) the
shooting of his wife, is, even if there is no direct evidence
, would he be the most likely suspect ?
he's a good actor and i don't feel he ever denied being responsible for the murder !
murder always seems a contradictory process to me
, the negative consequences of being the most likely suspect must always outweight any perceived benefit of the murder, and tautologically most murders are committed by the likely suspect !
a successful murder needs to be committed by an unlikely suspect, but again tautologically they do not commit murder, because, being unlikely they have nomotiveorbenefit to gain !
the most telling indication of guilt was his ‘
socialization violence ’ experience as a
child which seems a bit unfair
poor fellow, it seems you can't do anything if you are famous without being
noticed !
constance woolson’s short story collection “ miss grief and other stories ” has a
gem called “ st. clair flats ”
interestingly you can get a good idea of what the the st. clair flats were like by doing a google
image search
!
zakaj, i have had advice i haven't listened to for ten, twenty, thirty years, it doesn't hurt me to see you go through the same process !
let’s hope your avoidance is not too fatal ! :o )
zakaj, i have had advice i haven't listened to for ten, twenty, thirty years, it doesn't hurt me to see you go through the same process !
zakaj, i have had advice i haven't listened to for ten, twenty, thirty years, it doesn't hurt me to see you go through the same process
sepehr asks/writes
After studying Richard Carrier, I think people are retarded to ever have believed in a historical Jesus in the first place. It's so fucking obvious, lol. There is just a lack of evidence
The early epistles and Paul treat him as a celestial being that people know through divine revelation, and the Gospels were altered a lot in the beginning by early Christian rival sects to give the impression of Jesus being a historical figure (ie "Euhemerism")
Tacitus, Jospehus, and Tallus are not reliable evidence too for obvious reasons
Also, there are way too many parallels to the death and resurrection savior gods to take the Jesus myth seriously
Do you have the link arguing that Buddha was originally a tree shrine God ? Thanks
my
r e p l y
the argument for buddha being a tree shrine god is that the character is clearly fictitious being so incongruous with real life so you are merely looking for an explanation of the context in which it arose
tree shrine worship has always been endemic to the area and the deepest level of excavation at the supposed birthplace of buddha, lumbini, has
uncovered a tree shrine !
islam also has an issue with the earliest koran being dated as written before muhammad’s maturity
the way i approach it is jesus, buddha and muhammad’s lives are utterly asynchronous with the way the world works and “real” prophets like mani have lives and meet a fate much more typical of the way the world and especially religion works !
a belief in the physical and historical reality of these hagiographic supermen ( zen also pedestalizes the “ masters ” in its stories in a more limited way ) implies “ gods justice ” which is actually contrary to the way the world really works ie ‘ the good die young ! ”
another chronic distortion of reality is the belief that an underworld heavy, illiterate and uneducated like william shakespeare could have written those plays !
sir henry neville and his so interesting life fits the bill exactly as the real author and not only is congruent with, but illuminates the way reality really works !
bullshit reviews
I II
non bullshit reviews
I II
people just write so much crap and expect others to lap it up ̱ ̱ ̱ honestly brad , where are your standards ?
xyz you bruise those who care/cared for you or are all women like that ! ?
xyz you bruise those who care/cared for you or are all women like that ? !
xyz you bruise those who care/cared for you or are all women like that
xyz you bruise those who care/cared for you !
xyz you bruise those who care/cared for you
the heavy red roses smoldering in the foggy morning,
blood-colored and uninhibited, made me greedy, and tempted me powerfully to steal one — i asked the prices merely so i could come as near them as possible
from knut hamsun’s book ‘ hunger ’
I was on the verge of crying with grief at still being alive
from knut hamsun’s book ‘ hunger ’
God had poked His finger down into my nerves and gently, almost without thinking, brought a little confusion among those threads
And God had pulled His finger back, and behold — there were filaments and fine rootlike threads on His finger from the threads of my nerves
And there remained an open hole behind His finger which was the finger of God, and a wound in my brain behind the path of His finger
But after God had touched me with the finger of His hand, He let me be and touched me no more and let nothing evil come upon me
He let me depart in peace and He let me depart with the open hole
And nothing evil will come upon me from God who is the Lord through all Eternity . . .
from knut hamsun’s book ‘ hunger ’
four hundred and forty
million years ago
‘ most patients with melanoma had few moles and no atypical moles, and in patients younger than
60 , thick melanomas were more commonly found in those with
fewer moles but more atypical moles ’
some people can write with a superb, compelling and beautiful style, but what they write is j u n k !
some people can write with a superb, compelling and beautiful style, but what they write is junk !
some people can write with a superb, compelling and beautiful style, but what they write is junk
some people can write with a superb, beautiful and compelling style, but what they write is j u n k !
some people can write with a superb, beautiful and compelling style, but what they write is junk !
some people can write with a superb, beautiful and compelling style, but what they write is junk
a poem by sepehr
Bierce
disappearing in Mexico
Poe deliriously writhing in the streets of Baltimore
Lovecraft dying penniless
I'm glad to no longer be human
And you should too,
Bukowski
or we have swallowed the scathing light
We beasts abiding in darkness
sepehr w r i t e s
the whole world is a decrepit, recursive vine infested house of usher and it is collapsing
why should i love infinity ?
it is pure terror
my
r e p l y
ok that's well written !
well pure horror, joke, terror, stupidity . .
the other side is we in our limited life spans can know infinities beauty, itself as itself, that’s what this work is all about . .
zakaj, i have to agree with sepehr, you are out
beyond pluto or something, a really weird stupid space, but others in your life will be telling you . .
----------------------
your guru is only interested in the girlies
no doubt he has some “ identity with physical bodies” routine
you are a willing “connee”
maybe he's in a stable relationship in which case he’s just a f o o l !
ed. he is married !!
you are voting with your feet and spending your time here, canʼt you see that is your real judgment ?
----------------------
its just standard hindu cliché stuff, out of date and he’s just another guru wannabe, maybe he gets some funding from it ?
it will be like brad warner, operating in a sixties or seventies time warp, there was money in it then, now they compete with every housewife and her enlightened dog !
zakaj replies
well he was invited for a tour to india, so there is some funding in it. not many people do what he does, devote decades of their life living like a shut in studying sanskrit and translating texts for free !
my
r e p l y
ok so he gets an income to translate sanskrit, so he's really an academic in an unorthodox way !
that’s where he’s at and i know in your heart you don't buy into it, but it serves your purpose which is to keep you from investigation and deconstruction of yourself . .
sepehr does the same with media, anime, films etc
let me be clear that i am not saying either of you should do otherwise . . my life has limped through so many disasters i sometimes think i should have remained some clone in a job . .
but you both have limiting ceilings, there can be made no argument from me in terms of you not remaining below that ceiling, so to protect myself from further wasted time the public message section of this blog will be closing down
zakaj
terminates the conversation with
right
not that it really matters what I think in this case, but just for the record, I agree with you banning me from this place !
what can I say ?
sepehr w r i t e s
I've been home alone for about a year or more . . I don't really see many people
the issue is, I get too much solitude
my
r e p l y
films, books and the net are not solitude
just about every night i turn all the lights off, no computer and am just under my red headlamp for several hours, when i can i get outside into the lovely night . .
----------------------
now i think about it, i was brought up ‘ pre net ” really, young people have no concept of solitude now because of the over availablity of media entertainment and cellphone and text contact !
i was never that much into films, tv or music and lived by myself for a lot of the time, that solitude was always there, but now
shrug
what's wrong with me, as they get older all i see is my parents looking more like their parents !
what's wrong with me, as they get older all i see is my parents looking more like their parents
zakaj, at the end of the day i have had quite a bit of practical experience with real life religion
, teachers, centers and am a lot more cynical and jaded than you are about the vocabulary and people
you don't
vote with your feet so you are never going to see that and will remain stuck !
-----------------------------
like sepehr, you are just not getting the solitude in and our ways have parted, the perspective is too different !
at my age i have been surprised to move so distinctly ahead of you both, but there it is !
-----------------------------------------
zakaj comments
well I have seen many things when i lived for six months in japan also in spiritual communities
I am cynical too when it comes to religion and “spiritual communities”
zakaj, at the end of the day i have had quite a bit of practical experience with real life religion
, teachers, centers and am a lot more cynical and jaded than you are about the vocabulary and people
you donʼt
vote with your feet so you are never going to see that and will remain stuck !
the problem with horror stories is they use adrenaline to imprint junk into your memory !
the problem with horror stories is they use adrenaline to imprint junk into your memory
the problem with horror stories is they use adrenaline to imprint rubbish into your memory !
the problem with horror stories is they use adrenaline to imprint rubbish into your memory
a woman may feel a child is entirely hers but actually its half someone else
v1 & v2
life is full of hostility why deal with more than you have to ?
v1 & v2
massive floods along the tigris and euphrates are the basis of the noah’s ark story
, 60 feet of silt and that sort of thing, they
need to pay attention !
let’s see what happens ! : o ( )
life
, the “ stairway to heaven ” tune was plagiarized, the original composer died at
45 saving his drowning son, bob dylan is an even more accomplished plagiarist !
the “ stairway to heaven ” tune was plagiarized, the original composer died at
45 saving his drowning son, bob dylan is an even more accomplished plagiarist !
i really am feeling burnt by researching sepehr’s suggestion of the book “the hospice” by robert aickman, its entertainment and wrong minded, this sort of swill is endless and it actually hurts to go into it . .
so what do i do ?
do i need a public message board at all, the reality is i don't, i am available by email or reddit nick, when i deal with people individually its easier. .
the basic problem with the public
board has always been because of the way i feel the need to deconstruct the erroneous viewpoints, so thereʼs just this ongoing burden that i am now finding too damaging, people following their interests which are peripheral to mine, zakaj is an easy example because he is so clearly in the gabriel pradīpaka camp, totally bizarre but i am not in the business of remedying his mistake, this is it, people really have their own views and the energy required for deconstruction to keep this public message board sane is just too much for me !
so i am suspending the comments section in two or three days, after that i will permit comments as i feel suitable which at this point will only be people asking for contact information or having an important announcement !
so in effect this blog ceases to be a public discussion board . .
one of the factors in this decision has been observing blogs or facebook pages of people who give retreats and that sort of thing, they also have this issue of the discussion running away in directions that are negative for their reputation and quite involving if they care to step into the fray . .
so its just like a general issue and iʼm not into fixing the world at all if it were even possible !
:o)
sepehr claims
robert aickman’s “the hospice” is very similar to ‘ melancholia ’ in its theme
it's not really a horror story
i recommend reading it in full before judging it
i found its destabilizing effect to be much stronger than melancholia even
my
r e p l y
isnʼt it a rip off of thomas mann’s ‘ the house berghof ’ in “ the magic mountain ” ?
i have a true horror story about
berlins pub between inangahua and westport, middle of nowhere, looked ok
( that link is new buildings, its 21 years since i stayed there ! )
the barman was drunk, and a man and his date stayed all night at the bar with the music so loud that one couldn't even sleep with ear plugs !
“ destabilizing ” doesnʼt even begin to describe it !
:o)
the
final paragraph of a post by zakaj
you had truly profound insight but unfortunately you havenʼt met an enlightened person yet so you have no way of clarifying those experiences and reasoning about your self properly
poetry cannot do that for you, you have to meet someone who achieved final liberation
my
r e p l y
when you get “ final liberation ” let us know and not before !
i wonder what your wifeʼs version of your getting drunk was since from experience i know you donʼt take responsibility for anything else !
“ the main thing is to learn about trika / kashmir shaivism under my guru ”
honestly in ten years you will still be at that stage, projecting into something that you havenʼt done !
karl ove knausgaard’s
vision of a face in the sea !
that’s dai kensho, without reason or context . . maybe he also would have preferred to be blind ! : o (
religious names daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are about as toxic !
religious names daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are about as toxic
religious names, daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are about as toxic !
religious names, daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are about as toxic
religious names daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are as toxic !
religious names daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are as toxic
religious names, daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are as toxic !
religious names, daido, shugen, gesshin, ko shin, seon joon, they wear them like tattoos and are as toxic
high blood pressure, by driving
more angiogenesis must be a factor in both cancer and macular degeneration !
“ the pressure exerted by the blood causes the membrane of endothelial cells to cave in and grow into the cell's body, until a continuous vessel forms ”
jesus after all these years i think i have learnt to w r i t e
i can tack this stuff out endlessly
since i was writing poetry before that leads to the interesting conclusion that poetry is not writing
: o )
i have been looking at karl ove knausgaard and there are a lot of similarities except i am more abstract, poetic and philosophical and less popular because of that of course . .
in the end celibacy is what suits me, however its not something we willingly approach, but rather its the clear path from the tangle of bad relationships . .
r e j e c t i o n
and brutal h u r t
in the end celibacy is what suits me, however its not something we willingly approach, but rather its the clear path from the tangle of bad relationships . .
and brutal h u r t
i have criticized reddit zen, brad warner and gesshin in this blog, what’s really sick is they make no mention of it
i know if someone commented adversely on me i would respond
some on reddit zen read this blog, i can see the odd subtle reference in their posting there . .
brad warner i have noticed previously has an atrocious habit of deliberately not reading anything “challenging” for him, it makes him a brilliant subject in the sense of someone following their own track providing good material to comment on of course . . : o )
gesshin of course is a complex mix of intelligence and stupidity, most of our conditions btw ! : o ) (
but they filter reality and how people perceive them
they are doomed to remain ordinary toads in the slime i am afraid ! :o)
adam tebbe is another milksop, backbone of jelly and idiot to suit !
i suppose the reality is they are sick and damaged puppies while a tiger prowls !
if you get a bad stomach virus
any fruit should be pasturized
cut back on immune suppressing supplements like krill and fish oil and vitamin D
don't eat too rich
(scallops fried in butter ! : o )
chicken soup and broths are what they used to feed invalids
really bad viruses it can pay not to eat for several days and just lie in bed !
swallowing (unpasturized?) undiluted juice from freshly squeezed quality lemons is very helpful for gastro bugs !
there’s a lot of new research saying that sitting is a very significant health hazard !
i try to get up and walk around every quarter of an hour now !
jason w r i t e s
the good thing about conversation in writing compared to talking is that you have time to think about what you'd like to say
a reddit
post
I'm an officer in the United States Navy
One time on my first ship, one of the lookouts called me and said he saw a green flare on the horizon
I asked if he was sure, if maybe he saw the sun glinting off the sea or maybe just a trick in his peripheral vision
He swore up and down that he saw it, that he wouldn't have mistaken it for anything else. I didn't see anything on radar in that direction, but sometimes small wooden fishing boats don't show up well on radar
I called the Captain to report it and asked if he wanted to investigate further. He said that we needed to get to our destination on time for the next phase of our mission and that we didn't have time to turn around
The sailor almost physically fought me when I told him we would press on. He was that sure that he saw something
Sometimes I wonder if it was nothing at all . . . or if we left some stranded souls lost at sea
starlings on the power lines, notes on a somewhat staff !
starlings on the power lines
staffed music notes
!
starlings on the power lines
staffed music notes
starlings on the power lines, music notes on a staff
starlings on the power lines, stemless crotchets
starlings on the power lines
stemless crotchets
starlings on the power lines, a sheet of music notes
stemless crotchets
starlings on the power lines, a sheet of music notes
the supposedly unique
style of karl ove knausgård is actually a blog
, its a bit like ‘ fifty shades of grey ’
, a sleight of the hand or mind and an internet literary form has crossed over into the old fashioned world of book publishing !
it struck me that charles bukowski’s story of when he was living with jane and looking out the window of their apartment and seeing a man falling past having jumped to his death may be all that is known of that man now and certainly soon will all be that is known
and one thousand years hence this man will be more known than just about anybody of these generations . .
from reddit
I lived in new zealand for
2.5 years and loved it
everything about it and pretty well everyone I met
kiwis of all races are a special breed and they'd do anything for you
that said, there is an undercurrent of a weird sort of institutionalized/culturally acceptable racism
it’s weirdly unexpected and a real turd in the punchbowl when otherwise you're in paradise
it’s not at all one sided either, it's just a general feeling amongst all kiwis that people believe that the race that they aren't are not as good, and generally that stereotypes are true
I think it's best demonstrated by the term ‘ european kiwi ’
, which is what a white kiwi will call themselves
my
r e p l y
being born and bred there my nomenclature is a bit different, ‘ kiwi ’ is an external reference by foreigners, one is of european, maori, pacific islander origin or perhaps chinese or indian
to join a monastic order is to join a voluntary prison
!
to join a monastic order is to join a voluntary prison
to join a monastic order is to enter a voluntary prison
!
to join a monastic order  is to enter a voluntary prison
to join a monastic order  is to enter a voluntary prison
audio
i was thinking about zakaj and myself, i donʼt think he knows what he is on about and he doesnʼt think i know what i am on about
this is exactly the situation on reddit zen, none of them think any of the others know what they are on about
that sort of situation is good for what ?
developing fighting skills ?
what else ?
because of the contempt in which they all hold each other, for any semblance of sanity the subreddit has been forced into quoted zen records as its content, but this is just them following their christian cultural roots
, “divine scripture” so to speak and them being so stupid, indeed downright cretinous is the only way to put it, not to realise the voynichy nature of this “scripture” misrecordered, fictionalized and alienated by culture and time from a decipherable translation . .
a literal ‘ ship of fools ’ throwing mud pies and chinese fortune cookie confetti around . . ‘ waiting for godot ’ on steroids and retardation !
i think you have to go through it once, getting back together with the ex to
learn that one break up is enough, it will never work getting back together again !
with the final breakup, you can dance a little jig, you have seen them truly, the mystique is gone and you won't fall in that trap/make that mistake again !
: o )
“ i don't think he ever goes too far, because he is just writing what he is writing from himself, you can never go too far, its infinite what you can say and what you can feel and what you can express, and so its never too far, its always good and looking forward to more, whatever the content is it just gets further and further, but its not shocking, maybe more truthful and i like that ”
a well trained wife
, linda bukowski !
perhaps more insightful than anything charles ever said !
ask reddit, overseas travellers
post about bad incidents and national features
jon w r i t e s
seems there’s only a few people who try to understand the old patriarch
most just hate him
but theyʼll probably pick his bones clean when he’s dead
my
r e p l y
it always seems to be fairly straightforward to me, what this ‘ work ’ is about, but the way people run or get abrasive and confronting when they address it is always disturbing !
young women are like flowers, all their effort goes into appearance to attract and enmesh the male so that they can then move onto their real business which is breeding and children
!
men too are designed to be enmeshed !
young women are like flowers, all their effort goes into appearance to attract and enmesh the male so that they can then move onto their real business which is breeding and children
!
young women are like flowers, all their effort goes into appearance to attract and enmesh the male so that they can then move onto their real business which is breeding !
women are like flowers, all their effort goes into appearance to attract and enmesh the male so that they can then move onto their real business which is breeding !
men too are designed to be enmeshed !
women are like flowers, all their effort goes into appearance to attract and enmesh the male so that they can then move onto their real business which is breeding !
women are like flowers, all their effort goes into appearance to attract and enmesh the male so that they can then move onto their real business which is breeding
late middle age, the exciting business of working out what ache means what and where and why and how ?
late middle age, the exciting business of working out what ache means what and where and why and how ?
late middle age the exciting business of working out what ache means what and where and why and how ?
v2
late middle age, the exciting business of working out what pain or ache where and what and why
v1
in the end, if it turns out to your advantage
, what can you say ?
in the end, if it turns out to your advantage what can you say ?
in the end if it turns out to your advantage what can you say ?
in the end if it turns out to your advantage what can you say
ends
four serial
i always find dealing with people very painful
, sitting there in their little boxes of craziness
my very act of talking to them upsets them !
i always find dealing with people very painful
, sitting there in their little boxes of craziness
my very act of talking to them upsets them
i always find dealing with people very painful
, sitting there in their little boxes of craziness
i always find dealing with people very painful
, sitting there in their little boxes of c r a z i n e s s
i always find dealing with people very painful
i suppose i could be like charles bukowski and sit down and write, but actually i don't write unless i feel I have something to say
like now
. .
o
)
i suppose i could be like charles bukowski and sit down and write
, but actually i don't write unless i feel I have something to say
i suppose i could be like charles bukowski and sit down and
write , but actually i don't write unless i have something to say
enlightenment is as painful as a relationship break-up
, logically there has been a loss of context, but it sure doesn't feel that way
with enlightenment the context of reality has been lost but we have to live it
, live the illusion ̱ ̱ ̲ ̱
its very painful
bascially there is no o t h e r . ̱
i wish i didnʼt have to go through this stuff !
blogs are solipsist !
that was a bit of a revelation to me, helps keep the boundaries up when i read others
thanks for that insight jon !
blogs are solipsist !
blogs are solipsist
enlightenment is like going into a movie theater, then realizing half way through, everything is real
when you go out its still that movie and you canʼt escape
enlightenment is like going into a movie, then realizing half way through, everything is real
when you go out its still that movie and you canʼt escape
enlightenment is like going into a movie, then realizing half way through, everything is real
justin beiber has the same problem as elvis presley, getting swamped by and losing his identity to the “hangers on” within his sphere of influence !
sepehr w r i t e s
When I think of Brad Warners's crew, I liken them as Wes Anderson movies. They have a strong community but are afraid of solitude and being alone; they do not value their individuality apart from the community and cannot think apart from it. When something threatens to destabilize their preconception, they resort to a kind of “Big Other” wherein they share (amongst each other) key jokes, degenerate music, and etc. as a way to solidify their network or community
They are totally enamoured by the drama of the game show, afraid of being alone and exploring the phantasmagorical inner world
Now compare Wes Anderson's movies to Lars von Trier. Lars von Trier shows insufficiency in being one with the crowd, in making one's views aligned with the crowd. He shows depth in the individual character, in being alone by the river, lying and staring at the moon, dreaming worlds of one's own. This solipsism scares those dumbasses on Brad's blog. This deconstruction scares them, so they babble endlessly about thinking they know it, rather than letting the solitude of the crepuscular moon wash over their delusions
The
7th zen patriarch blog is like Lars von Trier's films whereas Brad's shit blog is Wes Anderson. In here I feel constantly deconstructed, as if in a dream, my own thoughts flowing into me, creating new worlds from the dust of the old. I fly like an opulent angel to worldʼs of indescribable colors, alone, here, for the crowd is but a fancy of delirium
slavoj žižek
disparaging wisdom
bit of a tour de force actually : o )
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved !
its the evaporation of the context !
. .
o
(
)
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved !
its the evaporation of the context !
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved !
its the evaporation of the context
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved !
relationship breakups have no right and wrong, it is a partnership that has dissolved !
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved
its the evaporation of the context !
. .
o
(
)
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved
its the evaporation of the context !
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved
its the evaporation of the context
relationship breakups have no right and wrong
, it is a partnership that has dissolved
relationship breakups have no right and wrong, it is a partnership that has dissolved
if you are planning to add ram capacity, you canʼt guarantee you are getting exactly the same even if you buy the same sticks and actually the parameters of your original ram have already changed !
nothing sucks more than subtle memory problems, buying the same ram is safest, but no doubt heaps of substitutes will work, only you are exploring the possibility they don't match well over the life of the computer !
ram parameters degrade with time, with my initial populating purchase i buy a speed step above what they run at !
the cpu memory controllers run on heuristics which, the way they really work is no doubt a mystery even to their designers !
----------------------
god i can't believe it, the above was in reply to a
question on reddit build a pc, the aspergers hubric who asked the question hassles me about having a sapce between the end of a word and a question mark
“ just so i know ”
u ug h h !
and the woman on about
* pyschiatric and other meds on reddit medical who had me banned because i ponted out that those large combinations of medications aren't liveable and of themselves cause huge health problems !
a a r g g h ! : o(
i feel if i move the cockroachs complain
some wounds never heal
we go on to get new ones and
since our attention is on them
lose sight of what is always there !
some wounds never heal
we go on to get new ones and
since our attention is on them
think the old ones are gone !
some wounds never heal
we go on to get new ones and
since our attention is on them
think that the old ones are gone !
some wounds never heal, we go on to get new ones and think, since our attention is on them, that the old ones are gone !
they never go !
some wounds never heal, we go on to get new ones and think that the old ones are gone !
they never go !
some wounds never heal, we go on to get new ones and think that the old ones are gone !
some wounds never heal, we go on to get new ones and think that the old ones are gone
kyra nijinsky age
6 remembering her father’s first committal
vaslav
dancing in the
ballet he choreographed using claude debussy’s score !
estragon
how have you been doing ?
godot
just the usual, one mistake after another
estragon
# ! @
where i live
today, about 20 vintage rolls royces rolled past over the course of an hour !
brad warner spends his life entertaining others for free and getting the odd bit of casual sex !
brad !
brad warner spends his life entertaining others for free and getting the odd bit of casual sex !
brad warner spends his life entertaining others for free and getting the odd bit of casual sex
not
the
way
to
go
brad
its interesting to figure out zakaj’s
modus operandi , he wants his proxy system which he gets with gabriel pradīpaka where you can just go to sleep and donʼt have to make any changes, but unfortunately for him (zakaj !) and what differentiates him from the mass of inane schizophrenic “seekers” is he has a very strong sense of what is authentic to the point that even he canʼt really fool himself about that dreary wet arse pradīpaka and so is drawn back to the
7th zen patriarch
blog !
well he can play that game in his own time and not mine ! : o)
a break up is a wound that never heals
!
. .
o
(
a break up is a wound that never heals
!
a break up is a wound that never heals
being open to dissenting opinions is part of lifeʼs development !
being open to dissenting opinions is part of lifeʼs development
being open to dissenting opinions is an important life skill to develop !
being open to dissenting opinions is an important life skill to develop
overweighting quotes and “life guidances” are a form of magical thinking that backfires scarcely before the reading has finished !
there is an unknown quality to life, actions and outcomes which the predestination of quotes cannot touch !
overweighting quotes and “life guidances” are a form of magical thinking which backfires scarcely before the reading has finished !
the web is full of
wise quotes , but when you read the lives of the people who made them, you take the quotes with a pinch of salt !
the web is full of
wise quotes , but when you read the lives of these people who made them, you take the quotes with a pinch of salt !
the web is full of
wise quotes , but when you read the lives of these people who made them, you take the quotes with a pinch of salt
when you read the lives of these people you take the
quotes with a pinch of salt, or a barrel loads in the case of buddha who is a fictitious person and a rather sententious bore at that !
i was thinking that writing was inherently solipsist because it takes you along lines that further yourself whereas if one relies for social feedback on direction this takes you in an
anti-solipsitic — communal direction !
i was thinking that writing was inherently solipsist because it takes you along lines that further yourself whereas if one relies for social feedback on direction this takes you in an
anti-solipsitic — communal direction
sepehr wr i t e s
why do you use schizophrenic as a pejorative ?
many schizophrenics have incredible
artwork
watch this video in full. some of the artwork is mind-blowing. the neurological explanations are also cool
my
r e p l y
very interesting video thanks !
“ why do you use schizophrenic as a pejorative ? ”
there are a number of dimensions to that question and its answer, perhaps the most significant of which is the way i am using the word as a
perjorative , that is intentionally as
perjorative , not entirely literal as the people i was insulting ( interviewees and rick on ʻbuddha at the gas pumpʼ ) would not be regarded as schizophrenic, rather schizophrenia offers characteristics which when singled out and looked at
, they exemplify
!
that is really a reading age thing and shows a certain lack of reading sophistication and thinking on your part
however, taking your question more literally, ian mcgilchrist (how apposite a name for one of his profession ! : o ) favours the word ʻpsychoticʼ for an overall picture compared to ʻschizophreniaʼ
that is
, when he says schizophrenia
, he means it as a subtext to psychosis !
i think what he is getting at is quality and insightful painting of that nature takes more than schizophrenia . .
there are other elements and what characterizes the buddha at the gas pump grouping is a singularly dumbed down and insightless intelligence !
jon states
i think andrew wants to be featured on buddha at the gaspump
my
r e p l y
they wouldnʼt have me and rick banned me from his message board !
what i find interesting about buddha at the gaspump is its a huge amount of volunteer work by rick, but all he seems to get is the world’s flakiest schizophrenics
if rick was interviewing me we wouldnʼt get past a few words . .
jason writes (26/2/16, new york)
round 2 stomach virus, same week
this bitch I delivered to (pizza!) was on her cellphone outside when I pulled in, whining “ I just can't deal with stomach viruses blah blah ”
I tried to keep my distance but I guess that isn't enough
my
r e p l y
people just have no sense of quarantining themselves these days !
. .
o
(
keep to small changes, the road ahead is more apparent that way, big changes can put us in the mouth of the crocodile !
keep to small changes, the road ahead is more apparent that way, big changes can put us in the mouth of the crocodile
there's no answers in anything in my experience, just different flows and colours of sanity and
insanity !
a question to ask is “ is one able to be in certain situations without being permanently damaged ” ?
the question to ask is “ is one able to be in certain situations without being permanently damaged ” ?
thereʼs no answers in anything in my experience, just different flows and colours of insanity and sanity !
the question to ask is “ is one able to be in certain situations without being permanently damaged ” ?
thereʼs no answers in anything in my experience, just different flows and colours of insanity and sanity !
this is the
truth about cancer, it is never cured, only put into remission !
equally applicable to most health stuff, remission is a much better way of looking at things rather than cure !
i never paid much attention to popular music in my teenage years, its interesting now to put names to songs that one sort of imbibed with the culture of the time and really how intelligent and talented some of the singers and songwriters were, quite different from their stage and public personas, david bowie for one
maybe grace slick wasnʼt that different from her public image : o )
i wa surprised to come across linda
rondstadt who now has parkinsons in this well known
song written by mike nesmith
everything is uncertain, things that can appear bad can turn out good and things that appear to be good can turn out bad !
everything is uncertain, things that can appear bad can turn out good and things that appear to be good can turn out bad
brad warner is very resistant to jesus being a fiction, i think that is because it would explode as illusory the life he is living, that of a hagiographical construct, that of the zen master !
the theater of zen, the temporary illusions, its stories, institutions, culture and ceremonies that support that !
brad warner is very resistant to jesus being a fiction, i think that is because it would explode as illusory the life he is living, that of a hagiographical construct, that of the zen master !
the theater of zen, the temporary illusions its stories, institutions, culture and ceremonies that support that !
brad warner is very resistant to jesus being a fiction, i think that is because it would explode as illusory the life he is living, that of a hagiographical construct, that of the zen master !
the theater of zen the temporary illusions its stories, institutions, culture and ceremonies that support that !
brad warner is very resistant to jesus being a fiction, i think that is because it would explode as illusory the life he is living, that of a hagiographical construct, that of the zen master !
what is the fundamental rationalization for ex
nocontact ?
the “ no contact ” addresses the schismic shift in relationship whereby your “ ex ” or once partner has fundamentally shifted priorities, themselves and their new partner and not you
you of course are just fuel to burn for them, do you understand that ?
to cling to what was and no longer is is depressive behavior, the simple rule of no contact saves one from being fodder for another’s life, no matter what the personal tendencies !
though i'm writing to you, i'm also writing to myself
!
though i'm writing to you, i'm also writing to myself
jon writes
that karl ove
knausgaard piece really did a number on me . . .
i've been thinking about that for a few days now
isn't that what it is though, being fed up with being a mediocre wasteball that's just taking up space
being fed up and actually doing something about it ?
my
r e p l y
you are proxying into developing remedying conceptual systems
there are no “right” answers or conceptualizations or even questions or views . .
you are not addressing the validity of the solipsist viewpoint
there is only small adaptive changes and the metas/abstractions that naturally arise from that
what you are doing is trying to develop the metas without enough real world experience from the small adaptive changes . .
do the changes and get the experience and the metas will slowly build and put you hopefully into a better space, that’s what ove knausgaard is really about
though iʼm writing to you, iʼm also writing to myself
there is no world before you there is no world after you
there is no world before you
there is no world after you
the solipsist viewpoint
there is no world before you
there is no world after you
there was no world before you there is no world after you
there was no world before you
there is no world after you
the solipsist viewpoint
there was no world before you
there is no world after you
jon writes
Iʼm just a filthy fucking kid who needs to grow up
my
r e p l y
i donʼt feel that leads anywhere !
just falling for the world’s bullshit, you need to have a sense of your own superior validity !
brad goes to the conscious life
expo , i read buddha at the
gaspump , an idiot under every stone !
brad goes to the conscious life expo, i read buddha at the gaspump, idiots everywhere !
i feel like my life is just the unfolding of one mistake after another and I can't understand until i fully unfold each mistake !
i feel like my life is just the unfolding of one mistake after another and I can't understand it until i fully unfold each mistake !
god “pure land” is a lot of pompous mindless bullshit !
zakaj they don't come any dumber, you and your religious tourism ! : o(
. .
o
(
god “pure land” is a lot of pompous
mindless bullshit !
zakaj they don't come any dumber, you and your religious tourism ! : o(
----------------------
pure land is basically a non mystical paradgim !
95 percent of modern art on the market is just bullshit, its all just a con game created by the auction houses secretly underwriting the prices
did i mention damien hirst ?
. .
o
(
95 percent of modern art on the market is just bullshit its all just a con game created by the auction houses secretly underwriting the prices
audio
giovanni bernini’s
“ the ecstasy of st. teresa
” is actually a depiction of sexual intercourse !
t
y
p
i
c
a
l
c
a
t
h
o
l
i
c
c
h
u
r
c
h
----------------------
his
bust of his sometime lover costanza bonarelli has a rather marvellous sensual quality !
didn't they have some sort of coloured filling for the eyes ?
he was also responsible for the
piazza san pietro
giovanni bernini’s
“ the ecstasy of st. teresa
” is actually a depiction of sexual intercourse !
typical catholic church !
giovanni bernini’s
“ the ecstasy of st. teresa
” is actually a depiction of sexual intercourse !
typical catholic church
bernini’s
“ the ecstasy of st. teresa
” is actually a depiction of sexual intercourse
typical catholic church
audio
the shimmering moonlight makes all the rivers and hills at peace
the long breath of the wind is the voice of autumn in earth and sky
linji yixuan/ rinzai gigen
joshu said : if you follow what i say be sure to do the work, if you don't follow what i say, you will live as a normal human being, birth in the east, dying in the west !
joshu said : if you follow what i say be sure to do the work, if you don't follow what i say, you will live as a normal human being, birth in the east, dying in the west
joshu said if you follow what i say be sure to do the work if you don't follow what i say you will live as a normal human being birth in the east dying in the west
v1
v1p1
joshu stated “ if I cannot cure my own disease, how could I cure those of others ? ”
the monk replied “ then there is no one I can rely upon. what should I do ? ”
joshu replied “ if you rely upon me, tread heavily upon the earth. if you do not, go east, west — go wherever you please ”
my
re-translation of joshu's reply
joshu said : if you follow what i say be sure to do the work, if you don't follow what i say, you will live as a normal human being, birth in the east, dying in the west !
joshu stated “ if I cannot cure my own disease, how could I cure those of others ? ”
the monk replied “ then there is no one I can rely upon. what should I do ? ”
joshu replied “ if you rely upon me, tread heavily upon the earth. if you do not, go east, west — go wherever you please ”
“ intelligent design ” while roundly dissed in
anti-religious circles is in fact a response to the major problem of evolution, that the complexity of biological systems cannot be accounted for by itself alone !
however horizontal gene transfer and learning theory whereby the process of continual adaptation also generates directional genetic structures for the actual evolution of organisms
does !
i feel like life is just the unfolding of one mistake after another and you can't understand it until you fully unfold each mistake !
i feel like life is just the unfolding of one mistake after another and you can't understand it until you fully unfold each mistake
the weird thing about david
bain that i have never seen mentioned is he
lived in new britain and port moresby, papua new
guinea from ages 2 to 16 !
that’s the most formative years, there must have something in that that
socialized or predisposed him to “family annihilation”
so schizophrenia from his mothers genes and probably low sunlight during his gestation in dunedin as the most significant factor and a socialized violence from his formative years in new britain and port moresby !
the school at which his father taught had excessively
violent essays by the pupils, this fooled me at first as it pointed to robin as the murderer, how else do you explain that at a school where he was the sole teacher, well the socalization factor explains it differently, that robin had acted as an
unwitting coach to david !
he also got malaria in png and i expect this and perhaps other parasites would have affected him !
st. peters and the
baldachin , easy to appreciate the church as very expensive theater when you look at that !
click on the photos to get full size, they are very good !
jason w r i t e s
I haven't felt right drinking any flavor of nesquik, so I'll just have to get over the binge
my reply
binging and addiction is always a sign of a problem with the food or drink !
lol, when i was
posting on reddit zen i used to beat the shit out of them
thank god i eventually saw i was wasting my time, turds just splatter when you hit them ! :o)
reddit is well known for its mass stupidity ! :o(
just opinionated suburban drudges really, no experience of life beyond malls, drugs, alcohol and work !
recriminations have meaning in the context of a relationship since they may modify future behavior, once the relationship breaks up, the context goes, the ex has to be dealt with as you deal with others, too intrusive just gives grief, best to let go . .
i think that is the hard part, to walk back down the road of intense involvement to the sternness of being relative strangers, we are just not designed for t h i s . .
: o (
recriminations have meaning in the context of a relationship since they may modify future behavior, once the relationship breaks up the context goes, the ex has to be dealt with as you deal with others, too intrusive just gives grief, best to let go . .
that’s the standard preaching trick, always using
some-one else’s materials and nary an original thought of their own
!
a quote by søren kierkegaard
they understand me so little that when i tell them they do not understand me, they do not understand
audio
patience is necessary, one cannot reap immediately what one has sown
søren kierkegaard
so basically zen and christianity and other religions are all entertainment, the theatre of avoidance
!
so basically zen and christianity and other religions are all entertainment, the theatre of avoidance !
so basically zen and christianity and other religions are all entertainment, the theatre of avoidance
so basically zen and christianity are all entertainment, the theatre of avoidance !
so basically zen and christianity are all entertainment, the theatre of avoidance
entertainment is the theatre of avoidance
!
entertainment is the theatre of avoidance
!
entertainment is the theatre of avoidance !
entertainment is the theatre of avoidance
brad warner’s much self promoted translation of a line of eihei dogen “donʼt be a jerk” doesnʼt have the right connotation
is my
re-translation is
‘ donʼt be a miserable bastard
’
this miserable bastard says ‘ get it right brad ! ’
hydrogen bridge tunneling energies and hence the
properties of water can be changed by electromagnetic fields from 25 hertz to 10 gigahertz
who are you
who am i
who is blue
who is the sky ! ?
who are you
who am i
who is blue
who is the sky ?
who are you
who am i
who is blue
who is the sky
who are you who am i who is blue who is the sky ?
who are you who am i who is blue who is the sky
audio
the universe is in four dimensions
if it was in five, then
this can happen !
singularities can form outside the black hole !
this is what my work is about, the formation of these !
most women are unable to take an overall view and will certainly disrupt yours if they can !
: o (
women are unable to take an overall view and will certainly disrupt yours if they can !
: o (
women are unable to take an overall view and will certainly disrupt yours if they can !
women are unable to take an overall view and will certainly disrupt yours if they can
women are unable to take an overall view and will certainly disrupt yours if they can
thatʼs much better
writing , more aggressive and your own self !
that itself is the explanation, you don't have to ‘meta’ it, which as you point out sounds wrong !
i notice this a lot, just about anything the moment they start metaʼring it, they are fucked, real doers live in a different non meta mode !
you can do it or you can talk about it or you can both do and talk about it if the talking is also the doing of it, idiots like reddit zen just see the talking and think that's it so they spend their time in wanking fruitless imitation totally rejecting any notion that the talking is also doing ! : o )(
i did not gradually
learn reflection, i am reflection from first to last
the hardcore zen blog, escapist
fantasy , why doesnʼt brad see the problems ?
heʼs bound up in in syntheic reality, movies, appalling music and nostalgia
not a good advertisement for zen i am afraid !
now, little ship, look out
beside you is the ocean : to be sure, it does not always roar, and at times it lies spread out like silk and gold and reveries of graciousness
but hours will come when you will realize that it is infinite and that there is nothing more awesome than infinity
nietzsche always
depresses me because of his horrible last y e a rs . .
jason w r i t e s
dave was telling me about julian pölsler’s film
the wall when i was at his place in massachusetts
it reminds me of a story i wrote while in middle school, we were asked to write an ending to
the giver by lois
lowry
well my ending was that the main character escapes the utopia community he was trapped in, goes through some tundra plains only to be greeted by an invisble wall that he's not able to go through
the teacher said he didnʼt understand, so i changed it to an invisible electric wall that would shock you if you touched it, and was impossible to get around
still he didn't get it he said, years later this teacher went on to get a ph.d
my c o m m e n t
for sheer stupidity and
anti-creativity you cannot beat a philosophy or english literature Phd !
college/university education has by and large created a vast pool of the educated
anti talented that wreck/wreak their foul idioacy all over the current arts s c e n e . .
the current system teaches then to like rubbish and reject depth !
p r e t e n d e r s a l l ! : o (
you know when the
3am moon has set its gone !
you know when the
3am moon has set its gone
you know when the moon has set its gone !
you know when the moon has set its gone
you know when the
3am moon sets its gone !
you know when the
3am moon sets its gone
you know when the moon sets its gone !
you know when the moon sets its gone
a
21st century man
talking (video one third of the way down the page) to a hadza boy who is a living representative of a hunter gather culture possibly going right back to the earliest homo sapiens
, 700,000 years ago
, he seems quite recognizable to me !
god,
psychedelic dick suckers, they literally shake with orgasms as they write and compliment each other ! : o (
its really bad news when you step out to help
some-one else with no benefit to yourself !
this benefit can be reasonably subtle like just gaining experience handling a certain situation or working through the raised material . .
its really bad news when you step out to help
some-one else with no benefit to yourself !
people try to make sense of zen from the wrong perspective
the perspective is screwed so they only generate rambling
people try to make sense of zen from the wrong perspective
the perspective is screwed so they are only going to generate rambling
you are trying to make sense of something from the wrong perspective
the perspective is screwed so you only generate rambling
you are trying to make sense of something from the wrong perspective
the perspective is screwed so you are only going to generate rambling
its hard to make sense of zen without a wide range of quality reading
it really is something quite specific, that is a celibate chinese mystical tradition in the tang and sung dynasties in china, also in medieval japan
other mystical traditions can be found in christanity, sufism, that’s at least what we have written records for . .
this western “zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance” “buji” meiji zen is just total bullshit and if you look at the old zen records, they are mostly a very few people who understand what it is about shooting down the hundreds of useless idiots who think they know it all
the way zen gets used now is a form of minimalism, just ignore the vast resources of quality literature, philosophy, art and our own cultural religious histories
- - - they ignore all that and just blather clichés
what can you do, they all suck each other’s dicks . . count me out ! :o)
joshu was asked “ where is your mind focused ? ”
he replied
where there is no intention
a good selection of books is available on
undernet #bookz @search
whateverhere
sepehr recommends the firefox reader for ebooks, html is ok and to avoid word format !
karl ove knausgaard is
solipsist
for, while previously i saw time as a stretch of terrain that had to be covered, with the future as a distant prospect, hopefully a bright one, and never boring at any rate, now it is interwoven with our life here and in a totally different way
were i to portray this with a visual image it would have to be that of a boat in a lock : life is slowly and ineluctably raised by time seeping in from all sides
apart from the details, everything is always the same
and with every passing day the desire grows for the moment when life will reach the top, for the moment when the sluice gates open and life finally moves on
at the same time i see that precisely this repetitiveness, this enclosedness, this unchangingness is necessary, it protects me
on the few occasions i have left it, all the old ills return
how one reddit zenner lives, at least as of a year ago !
“ my primary home is a cave in the desert canyon near moab, utah
the latest cave Iʼve been staying in is maybe five feet wide and five feet tall inside and fifteen feet back
it has a
tear-drop shaped opening, part of a crevice in a cliff wall
I cover it with plastic in the winter and it stays fairly warm even without fire
but I built a little wood heating & cooking stove out of a large tin, with connected cans as a flew, which takes the smoke out a small hole conveniently above the entrance
just a couple small sticks will cook a meal and make the cave warm and toasty
the cave is very stealth, hard to find, and doesn't even look like a cave even when youʼre close by
the entrance is south-facing, high on a ledge, meaning it gets sun most days in the winter
I can sunbathe naked up there in the dead of winter while the temperatures are frigid in the canyon below as well as in town!
”
150 retreats , an average of
6 a year, a golf club subscription would have been cheaper and of more value to him !
one just stares open mouthed in amazement at these over confident idiots wasting their time in this way !
i think that’s the thing about
the wall , you want things to be different, but you just can't
fucking do anything
! : o (
i think that’s the thing about the wall, you want things to be different, but you just can't
fucking do anything
!
i think that’s the thing about the wall, you want things to be different, but you just can't
fucking do anything !
i think that’s the thing about the wall, you want things to be different, but you just can't do anything !
i think that’s the thing about the wall, you want things to be different, but you just can't do anything
watching an ex have a good time and enjoying herself has a literal “ kick in the guts ” feeling, miserable bastards we are
!
when i get depressed/ i get depressed when i think of all the mistakes in my life, however breaking up with this ex was not one of them !
there's the weirdness of being celibate and there’s always this breakup hanging over you/me since there will be no new relationship to displace the old one
i really know life sucks from first hand experience because i traverse all the
“ it sucks
” junctions, a really fucked way to live . .
watching an ex have a good time and enjoying herself has a literal “ kick in the guts ” feeling, miserable bastards we are
!
watching an ex have a good time and enjoying herself has a literal “ kick in the guts ” feeling, miserable bastards we are
flamenco , you can be too good at something
, better than professionals, puts you in a weird space ! : o (
“ sugar is not converted en masse to triglycerides. less than
5% of the fat stored in your body is the result of de novo lipogenesis
excess carbohydrates means less dietary fat is burned and more dietary fat is stored
your body will strongly prefer to store fat in the face of excess calories, as fat storage costs about
3 calories per
100 calories stored while de novo lipogenesis costs about
23 calories per
100 calories stored
”
this
campaign to bring cardinal pell back to australia to testify in person to the royal commission exemplifies new social and technological trends
crowd funding, you tube/internet publishing, changed social attiutdes, publicity by promoting a social justice cause . . and the debasement/decline of the catholic church . .
when i was in western australia and visited the catholic monastery orphanage at new norcia (where they have a very good
museum ) the pedophilia in the church’s past there was obvivous
i wonder of the interest in running missions for aborigines was in fact due to a certain level of cultural acceptance by aboriginal cultures due to families being by themselves in the desert for long periods of time ?
interestingly i notice in myself a certain acceptance or expectation of pedophilia from the era when i was a teenager and younger and formed most of my attitudes (
60’s, early seventies)
, that such a thing was bound to occur because why would anyone get involved in the sort of youth oriented charity work they did if they weren't motivated that way ?
the church was once protected by attitudes within the controlling media like newspapers and tv but with the internet that lid has been flipped off and there is a direct route from the offended parties to the public !
distance running aka sustained aerobic exercise gives the greatest
promotion of brain trophic factors !
weightlifting does nothing (figures for sure! : o ) and high intensity interval training doesn't do much !
zen,
neo-advaita/nonduality are just stupid
, pushy, aggressive losers
! : o (
the more i think about, experience and reflect on celibacy the more i realise you can never get the required stability in the relationship ―
married ― + kids state
!
the more i think about, experience and reflect on celibacy the more i realise you can never get the required stability in the relationship —
married — + kids state
!
the more i think about, experience and reflect on celibacy the more i realise you can never get the required stability in the relationship –
married – + kids state
the more i think about celibacy the more i realise you can never get the required stability in the relationship ―
married ― + kids state
!
the more i think about celibacy the more i realise you can never get the required stability in the relationship —
married — + kids state
!
the more i think about celibacy the more i realise you can never get the required stability in the relationship – married – + kids state
if you have a stomach ulcer
, the stomach wall is exposed through it so the proteolytic enzymes
afp-peptizyde and bromelain will be a problem
!
if you have a stomach ulcer
, the stomach wall is exposed through it so the proteolytic enzymes
afp-peptizyde and bromelain will be a problem
i'm starting to get worried
, like fernando pessoa i can write suitcases full, trunks even
!
i'm starting to get worried
, like fernando pessoa i can write suitcases full, trunks even
when i look at all the marketing people like brad warner and jeff foster do, it seems like a lot of trouble for little reward !
it's interesting to compare the zen style of brad’s retreats with jeff’s more “holiday” style, he has the clear lead financially over brad as he leaves the accomodation cost separate as per what is available at the retreat and charges a substantial “ teaching fee ” whereas brad has to share the fee out of what is left after all the other retreat costs are covered with two others !
(actually they all go for the yoga and nina snow has a better sense of what zen is about than brad has !)
lisa cairns at least has the sense to make her retreats holidays though she could talk less !
i suppose since they are doing the marketing via facebook, blogs and websites it doesn't cost them anything except their time ̱ ̱ .
the problem with retreats with “ teachers ” is they usually fuck you up with their nonsense as the
semi-solitude and “ non doing ” puts you into a suggestible state, i am still ambiguous about having ever got involved with zen with the years it has taken me to untangle myself out of the bullshit !
my problem is without the stored knowledge of the zen records and even the sort of parallel understanding within the zen culture i would probably never have been able to break out of the conventional and erroneous socially received mindset i was in, yet what i reformed with was a toxic tubulent mixture of bullshit and authenticity that has taken me twenty years to sort out !
i thought i was writing this for others to read but but it turns out i was
writing to myself
!
i thought i was writing this for others to read but i was writing to myself
!
i thought i was writing this for others to read but it turns out i was writing to myself
i thought i was writing this for others to read but i was writing to myself
writing is targeted at whoever can make sense of it
!
writing is targeted at whoever can make sense of it
severe trauma we all want to avoid
, but in a life sense it may not necessarily be a bad thing to happen
!
severe trauma we all want to avoid
, but in a life sense it may not be a bad thing to happen
!
severe trauma we all want to avoid
, but in a life sense it may not necessarily be a bad thing to happen
severe trauma we all want to avoid
, but in a life sense it may not be a bad thing to happen
i don't know why but reddit zen and the hard core zen blog work wonderfully for me if i don't post
, i have occasionally been tempted to but experience has taught me to
absolutely not post
!
i wonder if my earlier involvement with them changed things so they upped their game ?
i don't know why but reddit zen and the hard core zen blog work wonderfully for me if i don't post
, i have occasionally been tempted to but experience has taught me to
absolutely not post
!
we are all the product of an extinct species, homo heidelbergensis
there is nothing surer than this species will become extinct
!
we are all the product of an extinct species, homo heidelbergensis
we are all the product of an extinct species
there is nothing surer than this species will become extinct
!
we are all the product of an
extinct species
when i look at charles bukowskiʼs list in ‘ so you want to be a
writer ’
, there isnʼt one item that doesnʼt check out, yet i donʼt think of myself as a writer, but hyperlexic caught in a trap of endless seeking and processing of knowledge !
but i sort of have an “ anti writer’s ” block
, so much pours out its painful !
:o()
good poems though, the stuff i really value and maybe include a few homilies in that only come occasionally . .
as i say i am starting to feel trapped . . i donʼt like the outcome for this sort of w r i t e r . .
shit in this life and a posterity of leaches on oneʼs writing . .
using
UVB to make vitamin
D2 (ergocalciferol) out of ergosterol in bakers yeast, same principles in this
patent as my experiments with using my homebuilt
UVB lamp on mushroom slices !
i think i
agree that ergocalciferol made this way is poorly absorbed, but my experience with mushrooms was that very large amounts of ergocalciferol were made in very short periods of illumination !
hmm, bakers yeast is
non-proteolytic !
some of the lactic acid bacteria enzymes (proteases) in sourdough are though !
“ the large use of chemical or baker's yeast leavening, which does not allow any partial degradation of wheat polymers (e.g. proteins) during food processing ”
“ malinche helped provide further proof
she had befriended a woman in town, the wife of a leading military officer
one day, the woman approached malinche and told her not to accompany the spaniards when they left as they would be annihilated
instead, she should stay and wed the woman’s son
malinche tricked the woman into thinking she had agreed, then brought her to cortes. after questioning the woman, cortes was convinced of the plot
he assembled the city’s leaders in one of the courtyards and after accusing them of treason (through malinche as interpreter, of course) he ordered his men to attack
thousands of local nobles died in the cholula massacre, which sent shock waves through central mexico
”
another pivot point of history, an interesting
read !
its fascinating the way
Toxoplasma
Gondii gets past the blood brain barrier to infect neurons !
it doesn't fool the immune system
, present forged passes etc.
, it simply sets
a bomb against the epithelial wall and explode it and in the breach gets through !
this is a bit weird to read, a self built
illusion about a life in
NYC as a comedian . .
a sense of belonging to d u s t . .
usefully
misogynist ! : o)
“ No Contact, which I started, seems like the easiest thing she ever did, while it's so hard for me
Posting this
here just so I don't tell her and regret it later
I guess I expected her to say something now and then, but it feels like I'm not even on her mind, ever
After
8 years of relationship she broke it up, and I started No Contact shortly after because talking to her hurt me sometimes
Not a word from her though after over a month of
NC, she is completely over me to the point of not feeling any need of checking up, after all these years loving each other
I suppose I should take this as a reminder that she broke up precisely because she didn't want to talk anymore, and that
NC should be an opportunity for me to get better, regardless of what she feels . . . . but it's hard to stomach that I was just completely abandoned like this ”
my
r e p l y
just imagine phoning her, she answers, on the other side of the room she is in is a boyfriend, she looks across at him and puts her fingers to her lips going shhh!
she is now ready to answer you
sorta puts you off doesn't it ! : o )
take the time of no contact and the longer the better to let life drive you both your separate ways
let her call you and when you reply, be guarded !
there is a
religiosity in the “bad quarto” antithetical to what we know of sir henry nevilleʼs attitudes that makes me think that the work is a plagiarism of his play !
you can’t persuade people out of madness
!
. .
o
(
)
you can’t persuade people out of madness
!
. .
o
(
you can’t persuade people out of madness !
you can’t persuade people out of madness
if you look at giorgione’s painting “ the adoration of the shepherds ” and strip away the religious meaning, the real picture is quite different, joseph is in fact a grandfather and the shepherds are the father with perhaps his brother and they are all bonding with the new baby !
that must be the real
genius of giorgione, to make scenes true to life with some sort of mythological or religious veneer !
the trouble with women is it takes a certain madness to raise children
they’re all mad
meataxes !
the trouble with women is it takes a certain madness to raise children
they’re all mad
meat-axes !
the trouble with women is it takes a certain madness to raise children
they’re all as mad as hatters !
the trouble with women is it takes a certain madness to raise children
they’re all as mad as
meat-axes !
the trouble with women is it takes a certain madness to raise children !
the trouble with women is it takes a certain madness to raise children
just because you can get involved in something doesn't mean you should
!
just because you can get involved in something doesn't mean you should
!
just because you can get involved in something doesn't mean you should !
just because you can get involved in something doesn't mean you should
shakespeare’s works, are of course english history according to the nevilles, that one is a bit hard to get around, the intransigence of the academic world to conceding sir henry neville as the true author is indicative of s o m e t h i n g
the retardation of university arts academica !
well philosophy is there too, dumb d u m b m o r o n s ! : o ) (
the stone retaining
wall and steps are better than the stupid memorial !
maybe the sculptor had to get committee approval, i can't see any individual making that abortion !
:
o
(
he claims its better in moonlight !
barbara, you are aging well ! : o)
isnʼt this a s c r e a m ?
:o)
I II
she was married with three adult children, i wonder how her husband felt ?
your wife is having an affair with the pope !
if we lived forever
life would make sense
as it
. .
o
(
)
if we lived forever
life would make sense
as it
. .
o
)
(
if we lived forever
life would make sense
as it
sense !
if we lived forever
life would make sense
as it
sense !
if we lived forever
life would make sense
as it
sense
if we lived forever
life would make sense
as it
is
it
doesnʼt
make
sense
an interesting
commentary on the renaissance painting ‘ la tempetsta ’ by giorgione
cut down in his prime by an outbreak of the bubonic plague
! : 0 (
if we lived forever
, things would make sense
but since we donʼt
nothing d o e s
. .
o
(
)
if we lived forever
, things would make sense
but since we donʼt
nothing d o e s
. .
o
(
if we lived forever
, things would make sense
but since we donʼt
nothing d o e s
if we lived forever, everything would make sense
but since we donʼt
nothing d o e s
do you ever get the feeling you are performing a volunteer service without much reward ?
do you ever get the feeling you are giving a volunteer service without much reward ?
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is somewhat between them !
. .
o
(
)
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is somewhat between them
. .
o
(
)
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is somewhat between them !
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is somewhat between them
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is between them !
. .
o
(
)
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is between them
. .
o
(
)
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is between them !
the trouble with art is it doesn't have a common vocabulary to accelerate progress
the trouble with religion is its blinkeredness, incredibly banal taste and incipient population of morons
the true middle way is between them
leather, metal, wood, interchangeably,
whatever made the form
!
4 : 00
how to tear/
b r e a k your medial collateral ligament !
what this is about i think is it is basically battle practice and the development of a fighting champion !
you think you can trust
some-body , then it turns out you can't trust them
people always follow their perceived self interest
you think you can trust
some-body , then it turns out you can't trust them
you think you can trust somebody, then it turns out you can't trust them
sepehr writes/asks
what do you think of tom hennen’s
poetry ?
read the poems available in the preview. they give me a ‘ sparking ’ feel kind of like your poems.
if I ever become famous, which I doubt, I’ll be sure to mention how much of an influence you've been on me, so that way you could publish your work like tom hennen and make a decent sum of money
my
r e p l y
you know what strikes me about tom
hennen ?
there’s space and time . .
not overbusy like today’s media filled nightmare, an internal intrusion on any authentic self we might have !
----------------------
sales of tom hennen will be like brad warner, barely covering the cost of printing !
writing is like raising children, all financial deficit and some illusion of continuity !
you know what strikes me about tom
hennen ?
there’s space and time . .
not overbusy like today’s media filled nightmare, an internal intrusion on any authentic self we might have !
to mix philosophy and politics is a disaster area !
to have people see where they are going is not conducive to certain types of successes !
to mix philosophy and politics is a disaster area !
to have people see where they are going is not conducive to certain types of success !
sepehr a s k s
in your opinion, what are the best roman stoics ?
epictetus, seneca, or aurelius ? what are your opinion on those three guys ? thanks
my
r e p l y
seneca
!
i've been doing a bit of reading on the cuban missle crisis and it had always seemed to me that the risk of nuclear war was overblown, that those at the top would never risk themselves and their families in such a way, but after this reading my view is different !
the problem is not with the president and first secretary, but that the local military command develops a degree of automony as for example in the near firing of a nuclear torpedo from the
B-59 or the destruction of a
U2 over cuba on a decision by a soviet commander not authorized to make such a decision !
“ it was at that very moment — not before or after — that father felt the situation was slipping out of his control ” khrushchev’s son sergei wrote of the
U2 downing
initiation and retaliation develops a mind of its own and thankfully khrushchev was intelligent enough and had the war experience to become spooked !
alaine de botton on
kintsugi
i am trying hard to think about this
post of brad warner’s and how to look at it simply and i think the simple way is he is adding the wrong way
the wrong mix of zen and celibacy/married with kids or even in his case straight promiscuity is at its core
same with the ʻmonksʼ kogen and his wife who now have a baby at tassajara which must be a huge wake up call about life mismatches for both . .
the beauty of celibacy is you can fluff around with your life and there is comparatively limited consequence for others
brad has a daughter, yet his efforts have been put into in trying to sort a friends marital and financial problems out (eliciting a strongly adverserial response)
, well
, as the saying goes, a mote in another’s eye and a plank in our own . .
in contrast
gesshin who i think lives the celibate life to a large extent, while lurching through a lot of bad or maladaptive decisions seems to come clear and move on in a manner that the more traditional zen and chʼan monks and nuns as per the older records must have done
its when you have dependents that things become fatal as that misintepreted zen story of the life of layman pang s h o w s . .
that is a good post of brad’s and he makes a point that i have often thought about and not seen mentioned elsewhere, that overweening confidence and hubricity we always seem to show when we intially embark on matters quite outside our experience . .
but gesshin is a bit of a stupid bitch and brad has a somewhat generous intelligence, i guess we are all faced with the problem of adding skills and understanding in our weak areas, yet we really donʼt see those areas at all which is perhaps why relationship and marriage to to a person who helps us balance up so to speak may be the preferable life path for most ?
shortcuts the problem with an already in place solution . .
but is also an alienation from the sort of understanding that zen is truely about
well the tragi-comic pastiche of life. . . .
brad it sounds to me like “rick” could have some sort of metabolic issue like prediabetes leading to a very mild dementia, when the behavior is uncharacteristic like that, there’s some sort of change you can do nothing a b o u t . .
its a great problem in dealing with people who are older, they look the same but internally they are not, yet we react with the same patterns we have learnt in childhood or earlier days with them . .
if you donʼt fit anywhere, what do you do ?
if you donʼt fit anywhere, what do you do
jon w r i t e s
I think I just want an end to all this but . . .
there's no end, no beginning
just motion ?
jason writes
art and literature is so much more beautiful
babbling religious bullshit i never got into
jason writes
art and literature is so much more beautiful, babbling religious bullshit i never got into
i've had a conversion experience, the failure of my life . . : o ( )
i've had a conversion experience, the failure of my life . . : o ) (
i've had a conversion experience, the failure of my life . . : o )
i've had a conversion experience, the failure of my life . .
as we go through life we continually generate alot of loose ends, to make sense of life we have to tie up the loose ends . .
the problem is we never get the time to do that and actually its a somewhat recursive process, tying up loose ends generating more loose ends, especially if its done in a fake way like religion, zen, nonduality, neo advaita . .
do art and literature tie up loose ends ?
or are there seeds of endless new inquiry left over and everything spins off into another infinite regress and in fact is not life like that ?
as we go through life we continually generate alot of loose ends, to make sense of life we have to tie up the loose ends . .
the problem is we never get the time to do that and actually its a somewhat recursive process, tying up loose ends generating more loose ends, especially if its done in a fake way like religion, zen, nonduality, neo advaita . .
as we go through life we continually generate alot of loose ends, to make sense of life we have to tie up the loose ends . .
the problem is we never get the time to do that . .
as we go through life we continually generate alot of loose ends, to make sense of life we have to tie up the loose ends . .
“ if you think about it, the low density of natural ice protects the water below it; if it were denser, water would freeze from the bottom up, and no living species could survive
so mother nature's combination is just so
perfect ”
a
benefit to living in the country ?
less exposure to a human pathogenic enviromental microbiome ?
i know going to town after a couple of weeks pretty much by myself really knocks me around, i notice myself being “ out of it ” within an hour of being in town !
i was brought up in a very rural area, maybe cities have never suited me ?
a monk asked joshu, what is unadulterated infinity ?
joshu replied, that is a good question !
a monk asked joshu, what is unadulterated infinity ?
joshu replied, that is agoodquestion !
a monk asked joshu, what is unadulterated infinity ?
joshu replies, that is agoodquestion !
i have a
self-destructive sentimental streak, taken me a while to see it !
. .
o
(
i have a destructive sentimental streak, taken me a while to see it !
. .
o
(
i have a
self-destructive sentimental streak, taken me a while to see it !
i have a destructive sentimental streak, taken me a while to see it !
i have a
self-destructive sentimental streak, taken me a while to see it
i have a destructive sentimental streak, taken me a while to see it
all i seem to go through is extreme learning experiences !
. .
o
(
all i seem to go through is extreme learning experiences !
: o (
all i seem to go through is extreme learning experiences !
all i seem to go through is extreme learning experiences
fuck off !
waste your time, donʼt waste mine !
fuck off !
waste your life, donʼt waste mine !
fuck off
waste your time, donʼt waste mine
fuck off
waste your life, donʼt waste mine
excessively
butch ! man a whole subculture there !
a caricature really !
can't say i like her sculpture, but she has a point “ bound energy ” a very gay paradigm, reddit zen from my experience !
[5:00]
the tension coil of sex without the bleeding of reproduction, r/childfree as well !
honestly, i can't understand the modern art scene, money for junk and
anti-aesthetic and there’s a claim human intelligence is increasing
well its a good game/con for money and all the
bullshit talked about it, pro’s for sure . .
to be fair nancy is very personable and has the artist’s mindset, there’s definitely alot of maternal/sex drive there . . i donʼt say gay is any less right than breeding . . just a very difficult tension driven paradigm/mindset . .
thanks for the insight nancy ! : o)
there is something to dan flavin’s work, quite theological really and writing costs rather than pays, that sort of scuplture is financial at least !
yeah, its an odd thing aging
its an odd thing aging
a great and sobering
documentary about 52 year old bill meier who delivered pizzas by bike in williamsburg, brooklyn (10 minutes long!)
thereʼs actually quite a bit to think about . .
he
died early february
2015, from kidney, ulcer and sepsis problems ?
wow, still has his
instagram page up, also a sorta obituary reddit
thread !
more
background !
can you call
some-one a butcher of feelings
even if its true ?
can you call
some-one ‘ a butcher of feelings ’
even if its true ?
can you call
some-one a butcher of feelings
even if its true ?
the “blinkeredness” of religion only makes sense if you exclude art and literature as they are generally a more sophisticated discussion of the same subject matter . .
yeah “constructed enlightenment” this is what they all do, build some sort of picture of what they think is involved and peddle it afterwards forever . .
its truely schizophrenic because it is of no practical utility to them at all . .
its interesting about forgiveness, i donʼt think you forgive or forget for good reason, but you can move to a more functional space where logic rather than emotion rules . .
people make mistakes, but the trajectory won't differ, caution and not being too negative are spaces to move forward . . i n t o ! ?
xyz w r i t e s
need to tell you before i forget, been hearing voices myself, less when i'm alone and more when i'm at work or playing soccer a mix of compliments and insults, and yes they can be subtle often quiet
when i was younger it could even be shouts, usually my mother screaming my name when
no-one was home, but all the time i shrug it off
last year after some friends left my house i heard someone run up the stairs loudly and then down again but
no-one was there
but yeah more quiet and subtle, usually with the voice of people that are in the room
----------------------
i went through a couple of months of listening to voices while at tassajara and afterwards
----------------------
especially during soccer i can tell it's just me, where i will hear “good shot” or “bad pass”
, it's just my own opinion
my
r e p l y
that will be the bad diet and viral enviroment at tassajara !
the voices are you, or your brain, but there is an interconnect problem between some parts or functions, will be a combination of developmental and nutritional problems
also the failure of the “ default network ” of the brain to shut down, like “ day dreaming ” going on when it shouldnʼt be .
marius romme makes the point that the characters and content are going to reflect our preoccupations and traumas, in effect the substance of the default circuit and very deep life traumas/failures/themes !
since you think you know better/ in your opinion than me, why go out of your way to talk to me !?
again and again i get these idiots who think they know better than me ̲ ̲ and go out of their way to tell me how right they are and how wrong i am ̲ ̲ ̲
i am happy to never talk to them again but they are unhappy if they donʼt talk to me again ̱ ̱ .
they seem to be totally unaware or at the least
not disconcerted by their claim to know better than me and their need to talk to me which is a subconcious need for my approval ̲ ̲ ̱
i think the problem with ‘ voices ’ and the problem the general public and pyschiatric profession has with them, is it challenges their sense of reality, the apparent division of self and identity no longer a p p l y . .
i think the problem with
voices and the problem the general public and pyschiatric profession has with them, is it challenges their sense of reality, the apparent division of self and identity no longer a p p l y . .
i think the problem with ‘ voices ’ and the problem the general public and pyschiatric profession has, is it challenges their sense of reality, the apparent division of self and identity no longer a p p l y . .
let’s not talk about visions ! : o )(
superior acoustics, amplification, layering, reverb, the list of advantages of the electric compared to the ordinary violin are endless . .
I II III IV
when i think of brad warner and the hardcore zen blog and reddit zen, they are people with artistic or/and philosophic pretensions that have never truely got onto the road they pretend to
the whole manner of dealing with them has shown they are utterly incapable of dealing with the subject matter in rational discussion, they are so tangled in conflicting
self-hubricity and what they are discussing, its just a tangled nightmare . .
i think most people are like this when they come to art and philosophy . .
when i think of brad warner and the hardcore zen blog and reddit zen, they are people with artistic or/and philosophic pretensions that have never truely got onto the road they pretend to
the whole manner of dealing with them has shown they are utterly incapable of dealing with the subject matter in rational discussion, they are so tangled in conflicting
self-hubricity and what they are discussing its just a tangled nightmare . .
i think most people are like this when they come to art and philosophy . .
when i listen to
this , i wonder that performers donʼt take more liberties with the original score, truely turning what must have sounded different on quite different instruments into something that touches the space of ‘ infinity ’ more ?
in this perfomance i got a hint of something quite different and superior, but i guess that fusion of a composer and performer that can deliver that is exceedingly rare !
sepehr w r i t e s
I think
childlessness ultimately helps one have more time to read good works and write. It's kind of essential
My play is taking longer than expected. I've been reading, researching, and getting solitude a lot, and I have been constantly refining and editing the play. I will finish a draft for you to read by the end of March, and I want to send it in for a competition in April
Act
II is based more on my dreams and personal experiences whereas Act
I is more historical with contemporary relevance
My wife is illustrating a children story I wrote, but that one is more mere entertainment to secure stable income in the future
jason r e p l i e s
I'm starting to see where Andrew is getting the idea of you going in circles
idk if you want to share, but I'd like to read your play as well
my
r e p l y
he could become famous and you and i will be ‘ has beens ’ or ‘ never beens ’ in fact on some lunatic fringe of association! . .
he has written one play which was quite good, the medium must suit his style of attention, i think the “ homily style ” suits you and me more . .
i can't get into the sustained intensity that writing a screenplay, novel or play requires, maybe its just a skill i have never developed, i donʼt know . . ?
the past cannot be rewritten as the present !
geraldine w r i t e s
tears are chains to the past. When loss becomes opportunity
, grief is redundant
my
r e p l y
the past cannot be rewritten as the present !
the past cannot be rewritten as the present !
if you are going to be childless, then i think you need to produce something, writing, a work of art, some other intense activity, charity even, whatever is your bent . .
because society is so negative on childlessness as you being a person lacking w o r t h
you need something that you can rest your self esteem in
there are a few poems i rest my self esteem in . .
its the notion in zen of “ dying without descendents ” strongly of interest in a celibate tradition/cult even . .
reddit zen and the hardcorezen blog are a mix of drugs, heterosexual and gay childessness and of course a few with children, a lack of artistic talent is a theme, brad warner (lol again !) is like that, meandering around in some void of writing and musical incompetence . .
all looking for something without the brains or diligence to pursue making something worthwhile in lieu of not having children . .
nothing so
stupid as
some-one won't
do it !
:o (
actually
water walk is quite fun !
a bit like these pages in a way
;o)
the mountain
photography is brilliant, the alan watts execrable and the fall line skiing probably can only be done for a four or five year period of these young people’s lives, some years to get to a sufficent skill level and then only so many years of sufficient flexibility, muscle strength and
co-ordination remaining !
“ why does the universe exist ? ”
what does it means to ask that ?
“ why does the universe exist ? ”
what does it means to ask ‘ why does the universe exist ? ’
“ why does the universe exist ? ”
what does it means to ask why does the universe exist ?
“ why does the universe exist ? ”
“ Chris, I donʼt know if you read the comments on this at all but I thought you'd appreciate this story
I have a profoundly disabled four year old who cannot stand or talk yet
When I play
this a look of bliss comes over her face and she starts dancing, nodding her head in time and clapping
Nobody has told her that Bach is posh so she just completely rocks out and gives herself over to the music
”
if reddit zen has a purpose, it is to keep the talentless at each others throats and off the throats of the talented ! :o)
if reddit zen has a purpose, its to keep the talentless at each others throats and off the throats of the talented ! :o)
reddit zen is intrinsically a charade of masks !
you can elect not to wear a mask, some do, but in the end
, like in real life you will always be outflanked by those with masks !
reddit zen is intrinsically a charade of masks !
you can elect not to wear a mask, some do, but in the end, like in real life you will always be outflanked by those with masks !
reddit zen is intrinsically a charade of masks !
reddit zen is intrinsically a charade of masks
i have always noticed how hard it is to get satisfactory translations of poems, ezra pound’s and david hinton’s
translations of this li po poem seem inadequate to me so i have done my own
re-translation . .
ezra pound
‘ the jewel stair’s grievance ’
the jeweled steps are already quite white with dew
it is so late that the dew soaks my gauze stockings
and I let down the crystal curtain
and watch the moon through the clear autumn
david hinton
‘ jade-staircase grievance ’
night long on the jade staircase, white
dew appears, soaks through gauze stockings
she lets down crystalline blinds, gazes out
through jewel lacework at the autumn moon
i must admit seeing such a ho hum translation by pound makes him a lot less intimidating . .
anyway my version (without title)
walking out
the steps white with dew
my stockings wet
no-one there
back in my room
the crystal curtain floods down
my loss makes the moon beautiful in the
clear
autumn air
the scientists say they have found
no thirty year periods in the last two thousand years that have exceeded the mean average European summer temperature of the years from
1986 to
2015
benign and adverse climate
conditions for agriculture have everything to do with the rise and fall of empires !
the severity of the justinian
plague is like something out of science fiction !
ezra pound reading
(1967) from canto
LXXXI
“ master thyself, then others shall thee beare ”
pull down thy vanity
thou art a beaten dog beneath the hail
a swollen magpie in a fitful sun
half black half white
nor knowst thou wing from tail
pull down thy vanity
how mean thy hates
fostered in falsity
pull down thy vanity
rathe to destroy, niggard in charity,
pull down thy vanity,
i say pull down
reddit zen, they are learning spanish when they are trying to speak russian
i was thinking how to put it in clear terms, like they are going the opposite way to what they should be going was like a little abstract for them ?
real life zen is the same, this woman monk/nun
I II at the mt. tremper monastery died recently after a year’s illness from intestinal/colon? cancer
, but really she was wasting her time being a monastic!
so people waste their time and lives and it only ends when they die !
99.99% of the time i am afraid !
years ago doing a retreat at the southern star cistercian monastery at kopua in new zealand
, the plain concrete graves of the monks who had died there made a big impression on me, something really stupid and sick about the mass production nature of them . .
shugen’s
obituary for this woman is the same i think !
mindless pap for a monastery life of mindless pap !
. .
o
(
“ pull down thy vanity, I say pull down ”
from ezra pound’s canto
LXXXI
“ pull down thy vanity, I say pull down ”
dr. richard carrier explaining the
origins of christianity as a highly syncretic jewish “savior” cult
“ all translations are interpretations ”
!
jason w r i t e s
st. philip, do you think it's his
tomb ?
where do you think the term ‘apostle’ came from if they weren't direct followers of a living jesus ?
my
r e p l y
the gospel of philip was certainly not written by him or the legendary persona, its
pseudepigraphical
the term
“apostle
” is actually ἀπόστολος which is ancient greek going back many thousands of years before the supposed birth of christ
, just means ‘ messenger ’
paul was an historical person, some of the epistles were definitely written by him but his “ christ ” was a jewish archangel, not a historical ‘ jesus ’
philip was likely mostly myth, maybe there was an early missionizing christian who went by that name, no remains has been discovered at hierapolis that might be him (though the relics could have been moved)
, imo since hierapolis was a spa town, they just dressed up the myth and built the temple complex as a more effective tourist trap which judging from the wear on the stones of the steps in the temple complex, it certainly was !
you should really do some research instead of just picking up naïve opinions uninvestigated, that's a real zakaj trick !
there is no evidence for an historical philip at all, these legends usually come into being as a combination of stories of different people and made up stuff, anybody who was being crucified upside down and had the offer to be released but chose to remain there is an obviously made up episode
it's actually fundamental that jesus, muhammad and buddha are fictions because if they weren't, then that would imply something about the world that is at a minimum in the sphere of reincarnation and a literal physical god and things just simply do not work that way and this is really what zen is about, this almost failed reconciliation of an ‘ unseen ’ motive force behind reality and reality itself, its there, its not there etc . . ! : o ( )
the above is the vilhelm hammershøi
painting i like best, i donʼt know why ? !
‘ from refsnaes ’ is the vilhelm hammershøi painting i like best, i donʼt know why ? !
‘ from refsnaes ’ is the vilhelm hammershøi painting i like best, i donʼt know why ?
‘ from refsnaes ’ is the vilhelm hammershøi painting i like best, i donʼt know why
farther lazarus al-anthony, he does
talk a bit of sense, but i wonder what would happen if he took a few steps back and considered whether what he was doing and saying was utter insanity, everything to fall away from around him, a defeated man shed of his hopes and dreams . .
the single biggest mistake that people make with zen is to buy into the hagiographical view of the “ realized masters ”
you have the enlightenment experience, you do the ‘ work ’ and life is/becomes just a dream of ease . .
you buy into it and then you fake it, i did notice that was one of toni packerʼs weaknesses, some sort of “ease” or “arrival” fiction, i donʼt think i ever bought into it, or ever had an expectation of it, but still i am astounded and discommoded by how badly things turn out !
you canʼt help but notice that the roil never stops, indeed can increase, ease is as much a dream as “ alice through the looking glass ”
“ my friendʼs dad takes ambien, after taking it he'll go down to the kitchen in their house, boil a pot of water on the stove, leave it boiling with the burner on and go back upstairs to his bedroom ”
mutations in the gene
disc1 are
co-morbid of schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, some forms of depression
and type
2 diabetes !
what is the fascination of archeology for archeologists ?
why
time travel of course !
what is the fascination of archeology for archeologists ?
time travel of course !
what is the fascination of archeology for archeologists ?
why time travel of course
what is the fascination of archeology for archeologists ?
time travel of course
“ in the image of the seal there is an emblematic element : a lamp hanging at the entrance, typical signs that served to indicate a saint’s sepulcher
hence, already
indicated in that seal is that the tomb was in the basilica church and not in the martyrion ”
hierapolis
home
video of walking around the tomb ruins
skeptical theism is a voynichy response to voynich !
‘ god ’ is voynich
, as you start so shall you finish !
skeptical theism is a voynichy response to voynich !
‘ god ’ is voynich, as you start so shall you finish !
skeptical theism is a voynichy response to voynich
‘ god ’ is voynich, as you start so shall you finish
skeptical theism is a voynichy response to voynich
‘ god ’ is voynich, as you start so shall you finish
‘ global workspace theory ’ enables me to say that animals have phenomenal conciousness !
i donʼt know why this has been so open to dispute, it's pretty obvious from observation !
in addition, recent research is showing than many supposedly unique human cognitive traits are also there in other primates, animals and some birds !
jason writes
i was laying in bed months ago when i had an urge to raise my hand, was looking at it and a purple octahedron appeared in my hand spinning
my r e p l y
iʼm gonna give a sort of “ interpetation ”
purple is charles bukowskiʼs favourite colour, its a sort of high energy colour with both danger and creativity, more male than female. .
now the octahedron itself is a bit unusual, sorta a blend of a more basic levels of brain function with some cognitive input/modification
spinning is autistic
i would say you need to be very careful of your health, particularly brain health !
its basically hypnagogic but has more to it, maybe a bit prophetic, who knows ?
lol, look what big breasts get you !
can even james packer
afford her ?
she certainly knows how to spend !
to be fair to her, she is on autistic spectrum,
workaholic , has difficulty in setting boundaries and may even be somewhat manic depressive . .
packer seems to be very typical of second or third generation extreme wealth, just a bit boring and stupid . .
well, donʼt women make us all stupid ?
sad ! : o (
actually the
great purge was driven by nikolai
yezhov and so extreme that russia was being rendered dysfunctional and in the end yezhov got executed himself !
i often wonder genetically what the effect of this sort of selective elimination has been, the more intelligent portion of the population, i suppose it pales compared to the degree of deaths in entire generations of young russian/soviet empire males in world war II
stanely kubric, obsessive
attention to detail
the gospel of
philip is clearly
written after paul as it refers to a literal supposedly historical jesus which paul never did . .
i think gnosticism is a closer fusion of the literary with conventional religion than is usual
doomed because it was a bit too sophisticated for the brutal powermongering and compulsion of ruling elites . .
the
tunnel complex at baiae is likely a
ploutonion
these past religous belief systems, taken so literally by people are like visiting an alien world . .
of course the common theme of stupidity is not so alien ! : o (
it only takes a couple of paint chips to substantially increase the blood lead level
although the
CDC has established the reference level at five micrograms, they're not saying that five is safe
at 5µg, there is evidence that nerves are affected, and there can be impact on IQ, development, and behavior
lead poisoning often is not noticed, because it can be subtle
initial symptoms may include fatigue, lack of motivation, poor coordination, and problems with speech and language
the above
quote is by marilyn howarth, a doctor at the center of excellence in environmental toxicology at the university of pennsylvania
“ mice with a single concussion temporarily lose
10 to
15 percent of the neuronal connections in their brains, but no inflammation or cell death resulted
with three days rest, all neuronal connections were restored
studies have shown that almost all people with single concussions spontaneously recover, but athletes who play contact sports are much more
susceptible to lasting brain damage ”
talent is uneven, it can be uneven within a talent or across talents . .
what gives utility is consistent quality within a talent, consisent quality across talents is asking a bit much of life !
sushi is everything that is wrong with japanese culture !
xenophobic, mercury laden, packaged in an indigestible polysaccharide !
no wonder they lost the war !
sushi is everything that is wrong with japanese culture !
xenophobic, mercury laden, packaged in an indigestible polysaccharide !
sushi is everything that is wrong with japanese culture !
sushi is everything that is wrong with japanese culture
what people ignore about julian assange is he is both a traitor and murderer, that's for real . . !
the net doesn't seem real, but information posted on it is a highway into the real world !
convergent
evolution , one hundred and forty five million years and a species between them
!
we donʼt have to deal with one another except for the practical matters so if we just stick to the practical matters then we don’t have to deal with one another
we donʼt have to deal with each other except for the practical matters so if we just stick to the practical matters then we don’t have to deal with one another
we donʼt have to deal with one another except for the practical matters so if we just stick to the practical matters then we don’t have to otherwise deal with each other
audio
there’s two sides to every story, there’s not just one side, the other persons side
, there’s your side as well
!
there’s two sides to every story, there’s not just one side, the other persons side
, there’s your side as well
!
there’s two sides to every story, there’s not just one side, the other persons side , there’s your side as well !
there’s two sides to every story, there’s not just one side, the other persons side , there’s your side as well
if people donʼt want to
know , you can't tell them, so you can spend all your life on reddit zen or in other ways in real life trying to tell them
you are just entertaining them and conferring some slight benefit of rationality to them
that's the point of one’s own blog, people come to you if they are interested and it saves fruitless involvement with disputative types . .
jason a s k s
where does your style of shikantaza differ from ‘ silent illumination ’ ?
is it the reading that you advise ? to not get stuck in one's own schizophrenic fantasies ?
my
r e p l y
i suppose “silent illumination” which is a translators phrase is actually “grunt zen” in modern linguistic currency
, brad warner's “ sit down and shut up ” !
particularly a dogenesque/soto thing !
i use the word shikantaza to describe what i did when i was involved with formal zen and when i initially sat i found the notions of ‘following the breath’ and koans infantile and actually following the breath for any length of time can be dangerous imo
so what it evolved into for me is really just a sort of decompression or processing, in fact i am not really doing anything, its sort of a weird and strange skill that develops, i can't even really explain it . .
the thing about the reading is it puts you in touch with people who actually know what they are on about . .
unlike the current zen scene where just about
99% of people passing themselves off as teachers are just plain wrong minded screwballs
brad warner is perhaps the best example of what you are asking about, talented and had some sort of genuine enlightenment experience but has the great weakness of very limited interests and reading and its just killed him, some pathetic mediocrity floating around trying to recreate some zen master/center success of the past
i'm not a fan of sloane crosley’s fiction, it lacks something, but listening to her reading the autobiographical
story “ the height of luxury ”
, its like totally different, compelling
i have noticed this so often, very mediocre authors actually become great when they write their own experience . .
friedrich dürrenmatt
interview
not a computer game, poor kid
, killed by the idiocy of those supposedly ‘ on his side ” !
sepehr
writes
everything is falling into place
my
r e p l y
the place keeps moving !
sepehr w r i t e s
everything is falling into place
my
r e p l y
the place keeps moving
sepehr writes
everything is falling into place
my
r e p l y
the place keeps moving
“ everything is falling into place ”
the place keeps moving !
“ everything is falling into place ”
the place keeps moving
“ Everything is falling into place ”
the place keeps moving !
“ Everything is falling into place ”
the place keeps moving
in my view, you took advantage of a rather
naïve and very
autistic man
!
in my view, you took advantage of a rather
naïve and very
autistic man
in my view, you took advantage of a rather naïve and very autistic man
in my view you took advantage of a rather naïve and very autistic man
“ at the core of all bad relationships or cults is one single thing
unreciprocated loyalty ”
“ at the core of all bad relationships or cults is one single thing
unreciprocated loyalty ”
a book
video much better than the book
!
humans are a crude sexual animal, overwhelmingly mendacious
!
humans are a crude sexual animal, overwhelmingly mendacious
i can go to sleep for an hour and not be concious of going to sleep or waking !
i can go to sleep for an hour and not be concious of going to sleep or waking up !
i can go to sleep for an hour and not be concious of going to sleep or awaking !
whenever i get one of these random charity phone calls my brain desperately starts to work, how am i going to get out of this
!
sorta like a crossword puzzle really ! : o )
whenever i get one of these random charity calls my brain desperately starts to work, how am i going to get out of this
!
humans are a crude sexual animal, overbearingly mendacious
!
humans are a crude sexual animal, overbearingly mendacious
who are you ?
who am i
who is the moon
who is the sky ?
who are you ?
who am i
who is the moon
who is the sky
who are you
who am i ?
who is the moon
who is the sky ?
who are you
who am i ?
who is the moon
who is the sky
who are you
who am i
who is the moon
who is the sky ?
who are you
who am i
who is the moon
who is the sky
jason w r i t e s
i wonder if andrei tarkovsky was poisoned, his diagnosis was lung cancer, but both his wife and an actor that participated in his films were poisoned as well
my
r e p l y
he had tuberculosis, was a chain smoker and in those days there was a lot of asbestos around as well . .
asbestos exposure and smoking is a death ticket as john loori found out !
the sadness of andrei tarkovsky’s life is all that
work which would have given him a nice life as he got older and the films became better known and then to be cut down like that . .
stalker
I II III
meditation, sometimes i sit in a chair, sometimes i walk around the room, generally i lie in bed for half an hour when i wake . .
i could just as well title the post below as ‘ couples fornicating truth into falsity ’ !
when i look at the insanity of the
buddhist shit on the web..
they really donʼt get that the so called buddha is science fiction . .
comfy couples screwing truth like it is a sexual stimulant ?
jewellery says a lot about a woman, what their tastes are and the sort of person . .
donʼt fold the legs when sleeping, always sleep with straight legs !
donʼt fold the legs when sleeping, always sleep with straight legs ?
donʼt fold the legs when sleeping, always sleep with straight legs